It would be great if you could get this to me some time next week.
If you’re having problems with that guy in HR, maybe you should just try and steer clear of him.
I’m sorry the downsizing has cost you your jobs, but these are tough times and you’re just the unfortunate victims.
Here’s the performance feedback, and it’s negative, which is very disappointing. You really let me down on this Mancuso deal.
We have to improve performance, so I expect all of you to put in more time, effort, and energy.
I want to create a partnership with Acme, but only if they agree to a fair deal.
I said I would only partner with Acme if they agreed to a fair deal, and I’m sticking to that philosophy regarding XYZ, even though a partnership with them could turn this company around.
Joe in sales may be a high producer, but I refuse to treat him any differently than the worst employee this company has.
If you find that you have more check marks next to the Un– Tony-like than the Tony-like Boss, don’t worry. You can acquire more of Tony’s communication skills by becoming more aware of what they are and by working on some of the exercises later in this chapter. First, though, you need to get past your fear. Most people are afraid to ask the tough questions because they’re afraid of the answers. As a result, they don’t ask their direct report what’s really bothering her or their alliance partners why they’re having second thoughts about a joint venture. They’re afraid to hear the answers; they’re scared that they’ll have to address a highly emotional issue with the direct report or that they may have to put the brakes on a once-promising joint venture. They’re also afraid they might hear bad news about themselves and have to change their own behavior based on what they hear. Yet once they hear the truth, they are in a much better position to communicate directly, empathetically, clearly and flexibly. The issues that need to be addressed are addressed, and the relationship benefits. If these issues are allowed to simmer below the surface, the relationship won’t move forward. When people take refuge in generalities and vague language, it’s a sign that they’re avoiding the core issues.
Tony is many things, but one thing he is not is fearful. He is ready to confront whatever comes his way, which is why he communicates so effectively.